W Hotel, NYC = WTF at the Bar?

I’ve been to W Hotels in many cities around the U.S. and have generally enjoyed them. Rande Gerber, the force behind the W’s cocktail program makes a nod to quality mixology with muddled herbs, fresh juices and the like. My usual drink at the W Hotel chain is made with Bombay Sapphire gin, muddled basil and fresh grapefruit juice.

Noticing some new drinks on the menu while at the W on Lexington Ave, last night, I asked the bartender for the Green Dream (or something like that) made with Right gin, basil, lime juice and simple syrup. The gal behind the bar said looked confused and read the ingredients off the menu. I don’t judge that – I don’t even mind a bartender consulting a bar manual. If someone cares enough to look up a drink to make it the right way, I’m all for it.

First, last night’s bartender asked if I’d like it on the rocks or in a martini glass. I said I’d like it up, and she chilled a martini glass with ice, which I noted as a good sign. However, what she did next is where the cocktail it went horribly wrong.

After filling a large shaker tin with ice, she poured in what seemed to be an extraordinary amount of gin for one cocktail, without measuring. Then she grabbed the simple syrup and poured in about as much simple syrup as gin. As she answered the ringing phone, she reached for a stem of basil - a day or two past its prime - then tore off a few leaves – and stems – and casually chucked them into the melting ice-and-liquid filled shaker. Next, she added lime juice from a bottle and closed the lid of the tin.

“Isn’t the basil muddled?,” I asked. She looked at me like I was a pain in the butt, opened the tin, hung up the phone, snatched a bar spoon and fished out the soggy bits of basil which she proceeded to put into a rocks glass, douse with yellow liquid from a big plastic bottle marked “sour,” gave it a quick once-over with the muddler. That glob was then dumped back into the watery gin mix in the cocktail tin. Her shake was a half-hearted, limp-armed toss of the hand (for about 1 or 2 seconds) and strained it into a martini glass.

“Did you want to start a tab?” she asked as she placed the sorry-looking giant martini glass in front of me. I coughed up $15 for the drink, added a minimal tip, and took a sip of the worst cocktail I’ve had in years. It was sickly sweet, there was no hint of basil at all, the gin was completely overpowered by the sugar and citrus, and it left a worse aftertaste than a sugary soft drink.

As much as I wanted to drink it (get my money’s worth and kill 20 minutes before my evening appointment) I could only choke down about half the glass.

I partly blame the bartender for her lack of skill and technique but I mostly blame the bar. Training is essential to quality control. The W Hotel enjoys a reputation as a hip hangout and better-than-average cocktails, but anyone in hospitality knows that as soon as a restaurant or bar starts resting on its laurels and quality slips, its hard to earn back its good reputation.

FYI - This is NOT Mixology...

Pursuant to my recent post regaling mixology and what it is, I got this pitch from a PR person, which is the perfect of what mixology is NOT.

Just for shits and giggles, read this recipe, gross out, laugh your ass off, then read the pitch which hails the creator of this drink as a "mixologist," laugh some more. Then sigh. This is why so many people still don't get the difference between a hack slinging schlock and a mixologist. Muddling an orange does not make this a balanced cocktail by any stretch of the imagination. I have nothing against this tequila brand - but having nothing but it and peach schnapps... what self-respecting "mixologist" would serve this with a straight face? And charge $38 for it? Are you out of your freakin' mind? Without further ado:

PLATINUM BRUNO JAMAIS MARTINI $38.00
muddle four slices of orange in a Boston shaker add two ounces Patron Platinum Tequila and 3/4 oz peach schnapps
shaken
served up in a double martini glass (chilled)

The PR Pitch for the "sexiest cocktails in the world" ha ha (and I quote): "This cocktail is collaboration between Bruno Jamais and Sommelier Benjamin Maury. Bruno wanted a signature cocktail using his favorite liquor, Patron Platinum. He wanted something strong yet smooth. Bruno liked the way orange flavor is often used to complement tequila using liqueurs such as Cointreau or triple sec but to refine the taste Maury suggested that they use fresh orange instead. The peach schnapps were then added, blending perfectly with the orange while adding a hint of sweetness. Initially this drink was to be served in a glass over crushed ice following the tradition of the Caipirinha but in keeping true to New York style they decided serve it up. Thus, creating the "Platinum Bruno's Martini.""

Yeah, I know. Now that you've laughed, cried, and pulled your jaw off the floor from the audacity of such B.S., go out and make yourself a true cocktail. Or better yet, find yourself a real mixologist to make one for you. xo The Liquid Muse

"Mixology" and "Mixologists" are Words, Get Over it Already...

Seriously? What is with people from food writers to bar round ups knocking the word "mixology" or "mixologist?"

Let's start with "mixologist." First, I'd like to clear up any confusion about what a mixologist is, and how it is correctly used: A mixologist is someone who practices the art and craft of mixology. Just as a psychologist is someone who practices the art and craft of psychology. Or an optometrist is someone trained in optometry. Or a scientologist regularly practices scientology, for that matter.

I put the "bartender vs. mixologist" question on The Liquid Muse over a year ago, and even within the bar professionals, it opened a can of worms. As far as I'm concerned, "bartender" and "mixologist" are not necessarily synonymous, although they can be, and they are not necessarily different, although they can be.

Some bartenders sling crappy cordials and cheap booze, add a little sweet-n-sour and call it a "cocktail." While many misguided souls may refer to that as mixology, they are incorrect. That is scholcky bartending. Someone who invests the time to educate themselves, train their palate, learn the history and art of classic cocktails and has the know-how to create balanced cocktails with quality products - and makes a career from it - can call themselves a mixologist, in my opinion, whether they work behind a bar or not. They are practicing the art and craft of mixology.

Onto "mixology." The word itself goes back nearly 200 years - and while it may have been used humorously at times ... both back then and today ... I challenge naysayers to produce a better term for the art and craft of designing cocktails. The "mixology" backlash is a bit like the "vodka" backlash. When something becomes mainstream, there will always be some to try to up their own cool quotient by suddenly deciding to diss the term / fashion / trend / insert-cool-thing-here, deserved or not.

My very first mixology mentor is Tony Abou Ganim, who goes by the moniker The Modern Mixologist. Tony is one of the most inpsiring and inspired long-time professionals in the business. Dale DeGroff, aka: King Cocktail heads the Mixology section of the B.A.R. course (the most prestigious spirits training in our industry). Briget Albert's new book Market Fresh Mixology rocks and drives home the marriage of quality ingredients with skilled cocktail making. Yes, even my nonalcoholic book "Preggatinis: Mixology for the Mom-To-Be" strives to bring quality drinks to the world of 'mocktails' (now "mocktail" is a term I hate... but why turn my nose up a those who use it? Everyone relates to something new from their own frame of reference.)

Until the big dogs in our own industry "call a moratorium" on the term and come up with a new word for professional cocktail making, I will continue to use and celebrate the term "mixology," all it stands for, and those who practice it.

Ok, this is the end of my rant. Got a problem with it? Leave a comment. This can be an open discussion...

Seriously?

Today's Hollywood Reporter claims that agents and TV execs are frothing at the bit to get Palin a TV show because when she appears, ratings hit the ceiling. (Are they sure they're not confusing her with Tina Fey?)

This country is in serious trouble if running for Vice President of our nation is a stepping stone to "reality TV." What's next? Bill Clinton giving sex advice on Playboy's Sirius radio? (Wait! forget I said that...)

*Photo from THR.com

Can Somebody Please Teach Bobby Flay To Make Simple Syrup?

While watching Grill It! with Bobby Flay on the Food Network, I was aghast when the infamous Mr. Flay, during his demonstration of how to make "Limeade Margaritas," said that simple syrup is made of equal parts sugar and water.

Dude?!!?

The SYRUP in Simple Syrup comes from its viscosity, which comes from using 2 parts sugar to 1 part water.

Geez. Can somebody please give this multi-million-dollar-earing Food Network Star a crash course in basic Mixology?

"She's Not A Bartender ... But She Plays One on TV"

So... those of us women who have worked in the entertainment industry in Hollywood have regularly complained about the way women are perceived and treated... particularly those women who are knowledgeable rather than merely beautiful. It is difficult for a gal to get the respect she deserves.

Well, call me naive, but I was quite shocked to get an invitation to a bar guide launch / cocktail-related event which hired model-slash-actress Molly Simms to host, alongside Dale DeGroff.

Now, we all know that Dale is the King of Cocktails. If anyone deserves to headline an event such as this, it is he. But, wtf does an actress/model have to do with it?

When I posed this question to the organizers of this event, the response was basically that although Ms. Simms is in no way actually working in the liquor / bar industry, she plays a bartender on the mediocre nighttime soap opera show, Las Vegas. That seems to be all the requirements for the female host.

Why would anyone who actually knows a thing or two about the cocktail industry look to Molly Simms for advice on where to drink, what to order or what a quality cocktail actually is?

You can read the exchange for yourselves… but good grief! This is a slap in the face to all of the respected female mixologists / bartenders / brand ambassadors out there.

My question: “Just curious, though --- why is Molly Simms involved with this event? There are many mixologists (such as Dale DeGroff) male and female who are actually involved with the liquor industry. I don't get what an "actress / model" has to do with our industry?? Love clarification on that so I can present it fairly on The Liquid Muse Blog... I certainly have my own opinions about hiring a model when a female mixologist would be much more appropriate for this kind of event...”

The response: “Molly Sims, an A-List celebrity and bartender on the former NBC series Las Vegas, is very familiar with how the entertainment industry affects Americans’ perceptions of entertaining and cocktail culture (i.e. Sex and the City and the revival of the cosmopolitan). She has gained a deep understanding of how one’s decisions when placing an order or recommending a restaurant can greatly affect someone’s perception of you. Molly is also a seasoned traveler and will be sharing her experiences on the difficulties of finding establishments that best fit your mood, wallet and tastebuds.”

Huh? I respectfully disagree. Whether we’re talking Audrey Saunders, Charlotte Voissey (the list goes on and on) or any other woman who is actually involved in our industry and has the chops for this kind of thing (and yes, likely travels, too, I might add), it is particularly sad that even the big liquor conglomerates (yes, there is one involved with this event) is so incredibly misguided in this kind of decision.

Is the liquor industry in line to become the next big sell out? If actress-slash-models are guiding what we should drink and where, NOBODY will “drink well.”

Photo borrowed from this article.

Blogging 101 for Publicists

I deal with many publicists. And, I appreciate the vast majority of them. They give me great tips on new products, and when I write about the ones I like, their client gets free publicity. Its a win-win.

This blog post is my PSA for the other remaining few PR professionals who seem to have missed the memo explaining what a blog is and how it works. (Go on, drink up… this one’s on me.)

I recently raved about a new product I received from a publicist. Her client has a wonderful liquor, and I was so inspired by it that I did something I very rarely do… I dropped everything and wrote glowingly about it, immediately.

Lesson #1: Be happy it got written about, especially if it’s a rave review.

As you can see in this photo, I have about a dozen awesome products, right this minute, on my “to-do” shelf. Some have been there for 3 weeks. I will get to them, eventually… (as I will my two monthly columns, follow up on a pitch to a national magazine, edit the manuscript of my book just back from the publisher, and film / edit more content for the new “vlog” element of The Liquid Muse.)

So, imagine my surprise when I got an email from said publicist reprimanding me for glorifying her client’s product. She wrote:

“My issue is that you didn't fact check and didn't tell me you were posting until the info was live.”

Ex-squeeze me? You have an “issue?”

Lesson #2: Here’s how blog posting works:

You send me a concise email with the intriguing things you want me to know about a product, along with a photo and product sample. Then, if so moved, I will write about it. As a courtesy, I usually let you know once it has been posted. End of story.

I can only attribute the “fact checking” remark to my proclamation that the wonderful new product was about to be unleashed upon the world. In her complaint, she squaked about it already having its first bottles hit a handful of stores, a couple of months ago, in one U.S. state. Uh, yeah...

Lesson #3: A blog is global.

Considering that Sipsters are as far flung as Singapore, Turkey and South Africa, I am not sure that the rest of the world finds it terribly convenient – or of great interest – to know that something is available in one area of one state on the other side of the world. (Pssst… this is why I use links. Interested parties can look up any details they wish. They even know how to order online. Technology rocks.)

This particular publicist also chastised me for (gasp!) using a photo I took myself. I did not get a photo with the pitch. And, even if I did, I may have chosen not to use it. I usually prefer professional photos over my own, but I also don’t have time to wait for one. I get pitched new products several times per day. I don’t have the manpower, enough memo pads or memory cells to keep an eye out for a photo of a liquor that may come in a couple of weeks. Grab the great review and run. I may not get back around to your clients for a while.

Lession #4: The blogger has the final say.

Think of a blog as a publication. Now, realize that the blogger is the Senior Editor, Publisher and Art Director, rolled into one.

The clincher in the offensive email was this person’s feeling that she was doing me a favor, rather than realizing that it is, in fact, the other way around. This condescending line stuck like a bone in my throat:

“I treat you like a journalist, and thus expected a rapport like what I have with serious journalists.”

Umm... considering my bylines appear in national and regional print and online publications, most actually consider me a journalist, thank you very much. It would be appropriate to “treat me” as such. I was also a bit insulted – on behalf of myself and other bloggers – at the implication that bloggers are somehow lowlier than journalists, and not to be taken as seriously. Ironically, most bloggers I know are far more informed about a specific topic than the majority “staff writers.” And, believe me when I tell you that many of those “serious journalists” rip-off content from our blogs, on a regular basis, because we have become the experts in our niches.

Lesson #5: Understand the difference between a blog post and a magazine article.

Being a professional writer includes having the skill to change writing style, tone - and even the rules - when writing for any particular outlet. My blog "voice" is completely different from my magazine articles. I use the “first person,” spout my opinions and am influenced by my own biases. Its a free-form arena. I write exactly the way I want to, when I want to, about what I want to. If you like my style, pitch me your clients. If you don’t, there are a whole slew of other cocktail bloggers out there. Have at ‘em. Or, better yet, forget the Internet and stick with print.

Lesson #6: Become acquainted with what I call “the power of the blog.”

You see, back in 2005, when I held my final “salary job,” I was a restaurant publicist. Our PR firm had begun pitching food bloggers. At the time, I didn’t totally get what a blog was – but I knew it tapped into a valuable demographic many print publications didn’t reach. When I finally “hopped the fence” to write full time, in January 2006, the first thing I did was launch The Liquid Muse where I blogged, daily, because I had become so passionate about spirits, wine and cocktails. I took a 100% pay cut. Even today, my blog is a labor of love. The fact that thousands of people, every month, stop by to get their cocktail updates at The Liquid Muse is of huge personal satisfaction to me, and provides a valuable service to both the liquor companies and the readers, if I do say so myself. And, my readers know I’m not stifled by editors, publicists or advertisers. This is the power of the blog.

Lesson #7: Print is dying. Be nice to bloggers.

You see, friends, paper and ink publications will one day be a thing of the past. I’m not saying I like it. I don’t. I love cuddling up with a book, poring over a magazine and flipping through the Sunday paper. But, every single major publication now has a website. And, guess what else they are rapidly incorporating? Yes, BLOGS! And, there is someone writing those blogs. Guess who? Let’s say it all together, now… BLOGGERS! If you are a publicist who has not yet educated yourself with a healthy respect for blogs, it would behoove you to do so. Unless you want to go the way of the dinosaurs, along with print, and take your clients down with you.

Seriously?

Is anyone really drawn to a Valentine's event that uses this cheesy photo as promotion?

The "voodoo" idea caught my attention as a cool idea but then I scrolled down to read that this event advertises "groups of girls" in attendance and shows this doofy guy - wearing sunglasses, no less - grabbing the asses of these girls in shiny stripper clothes. Classsy.

For the sake of Washingtonian singles, I really hope DC has more going on than this...

Fembot For President (?)

As If Our Government Officials Don't Already Screw Around Enough, Svedka Vodka Thinks This Will Solve Our Problems

I can't say they've pursuaded my vote. The "fembot" is already a sexist concept, so is it surprising that they find 'socialized plastic surgery' and 'tax deductible handbags' humorous? Puh-lease.

I'd much prefer to see Svedka market to real women - who actually buy booze, not Fembot wanna-be's - who are most likely under legal drinking age, anyway...

Svedka_grl on Foreign Policy:
  MAKE COCKTAILS, NOT WAR

Svedka_grl on the Environment:
  HELP END GLOBAL WARMING: ADD MORE ICE

Svedka_grl on Health Care:
  SUPPORT SOCIALIZED PLASTIC SURGERY

Svedka_grl on the First Amendment:
  WORSHIP THE CELEBRITY OF YOUR CHOICE

Svedka_grl on Red States vs. Blue States:
  SWING VOTERS HAVE MORE FUN

Svedka_grl on Tax Reform:
  MAKE HANDBAGS TAX DEDUCTIBLE

Svedka_grl on Politics Making Strange Bedfellows:
  SOME OF MY BEST FRIENDS ARE BIPARTISAN

Svedka_grl on the American Way:
  LIFE, LIBERTY, & THE PURSUIT OF HAPPY HOUR

Svedka_grl on Extremism:
  MIX LIBERALLY, DRINK CONSERVATIVELY

Photo courtesy of this site.

No Mercy for Vick

I'll raise a glass when that sadistic animal abuser, Michael Vick, is behind bars. During the trial, it was reported that if a pit bull did not become vicious enough after the cruel "training" it endured, it was killed, in very inhumane ways. According to prosecutors, "dogs were hanged, drowned and electrocuted."

Someone who bankrolled a dog fighting ring, as he did, should get 5 years in prison. Because he apologized today, and admitted he did wrong (duh!) he will get 12 months, if that.

Unfortunately, as we've learned from watching OJ Simpson, Kobe Bryant (sorry Laker fans) and numerous other celebrity sports stars gone bad, he'll probably walk with a slap on the wrist, and a big, fat, lucrative career.

These are the frustrations that drive a gal to drink!